Last night a number of interesting and rare things happened. I was playing Hexic HD with a friend, which is to say he was playing and I was giving advice. If you've ever played the game you will see how this is possible and potentially helpful. We actually got three black pearls to form a cluster. If you had told me last week that I would have participated in such a thing I would have not believed you in a forceful manner.

After this we decided to drive to Decatur to procure alcohol. I bought a 6 pack of Blue Moon, Mike's hard berry lemonade (Hard berries motherfucker. See a doctor.), and three different flavors of Boones Farm. I'm not kidding. Fucking Boones Farm. It has been a very long time since I bought alcohol if I'm sitting around and buying Boones Farm. I drank a whole bottle of it last night. It was like Koolaid with a sparkling fermented flavor, though I think NyQuil is stronger.

I'm not sure how Mom will take the presence of alcohol in the fridge, but I will do my best to get it out of there as soon as possible. I'm not sure she will take comfort in that either. I would try to invite people over to help consume it but I think every girl in town is pregnant, and the men are too busy beating them and hiding their shoes to participate. Not even for beer and the Xbox 360 will they stop beating their pregnant wives and girlfriends. Nothing like screaming first person violence in high definition. It seems I must undertake this task all on my own. It won't be easy, but I'll get it done. I have an excellent work ethic.

I was just sitting here listening to Blur, when I began to wonder if their lead singer is the same as the one for the Buzzcocks. I suppose I could look it up. While I'm thinking about music, I will recommend you listen to the Johnny Cash version of Personal Jesus. Much better than Marilyn Manson, surprise surprise.

Apparently Dad has to wait around for up to seven days while they wait for a trainer to be available. The good news is he is still getting paid $50/day to sit around, but the bad news is that there won't be a paycheck until he is able to make a delivery. I'm glad I'm not stuck somewhere with my thumb in my ass with no power to change the situation. I can pull my thumb out of my ass at any moment. He has to call a locksmith.

I was astonished to discover that I sold over 600 bags of ice Easter weekend. It was over ninety degrees both days, so it makes sense I guess. I told the ice delivery guy how much I sold, and he proceeded to tell me that a store thirty minutes away went through twelve pallets last weekend. There's 200 bags to a pallet. I couldn't begin to store that much ice at once. I am jealous. 2400 fucking bags. It makes me wonder what being busy really means around here.

So I talked to Dad today and he says he's all done taking tests. He thinks they will be taking off tomorrow at 1 or so to start on the road training, for which he gets paid $350/week. Once the trainer thinks he's ready, he gets signed off on, and goes to $0.29/mile. At 10 hours a day, 63 mph, that equals 630 miles per day, which adds up to 4,410 miles per week. That adds up to $1,278.90 per week minus taxes. (Today's post brought to you by the letter F, and by the number 1,278.9). That's not too shabby. I got 63 mph from the fact that their trucks are governed at 63 mph. For the uneducated, that means they can't go any faster than that. I was riding with a guy when he discovered that his Camaro is governed at 120mph. That was pretty fun.

Today was damned boring. I got to do a lot of thinking, and ended up calling myself a biscuit whisperer. You can see how productive my imagination is when I'm making up stuff to do. I don't fix people's problems with biscuits, I fix biscuits' problems with people. Picture me telling dark secrets to a bag of frozen biscuits. I don't know why you would picture that though. Prepare to receive my bad medicine.

I sometimes wonder if the Dreyers man knows I'm babysitting everything he does. I check with him when he orders for sure, but I don't know if he knows I check what actually comes in on the truck too. I wonder. If he finds out perhaps he will be upset, but perhaps he will stop ordering so much bullshit. Maybe in some other region people can't get enough of Dreyers, but around here, it's Blue Bell or nothing. People will pay $5 for a half gallon of Blue Bell long before they will pay $3.68 for a half gallon of Edy's. I can't explain this to the buyer either.

So I found out today that you have to have a year of supervisor experience before you can apply for management training. I have 6 months with the company, unless you count the 5 years I worked for Gnomon Copy supervising on weekends only. Even then, that was unofficial. I just knew more than the weekenders, so I was in charge of them, which meant doing most of the work. I definitely don't miss working weekends there. TakeNote can stick it up their ass. They never pay their bill anyway.

Dad has arrived in Arkansas for orientation. I guess one needs orientating upon arrival in that state. He starts driving on Friday for actual pay, so that will be nice. I'm sure he'll have some good stories. I hope his trainer is a good guy and not some kind of Full Metal Jacket person.

Not much going on around here, the internet was down for a couple of hours this afternoon. I noticed immediately of course, since I tried to play Halo 2 and was unable to connect. Oh well. We played some more cooperative, since that's less frustrating with two than multiplayer is. Widescreen TV's split the screen vertically, which makes it nearly impossible to see anything to the right or left. It's disorientating. I'm much better with the whole TV. Anyway, time to sleep.

Well, it's Easter. This weekend hasn't been the best one of late. Dad is back until tomorrow morning at 4am, when I take him to the bus station. He has a 24 hour or something like that bus ride and then he gets to the company he's going to be working for. He has one more test to take that involves 90 degree backing. I'm pretty sure I can't do that, but I've never tried.

My truck blew a head gasket Friday night. This is the second time it's happened, though this time it's not my fault. A certain connector disintegrated spraying antifreeze all over the place, and my Mom didn't realize anything was wrong until the truck wouldn't run anymore. So, that puts me out either $500+ or $60 and 4 hours of hell. I can't describe how I hate working on cars. I hate it. Really and truly. We still have Mom's red van that won't top 45 mph, which will get us to work and back just fine. We also have Dad's van, but that thing gets 7mpg, so that's for emergency use only.

None of this stopped us from watching Firefly on Friday. I believe it was the last disk. The last episode included Richard Brooks. It was a cool series. I hope they do something more with it soon. We are going to be grilling steaks tonight, steaks from Omaha. Rock and Roll is upon us.

I told this thing to add an image, but there is no indication that it did so. We'll see when I post this if it showed up. A couple of days ago, I killed my own teammate in Halo 2 and was subsequently booted. I can't really explain what was going through my head. I, for some goddamned reason, thought that I was in my own base, so when I saw this guy arming the bomb right next to me, I thought, "Not on my watch motherfucker," and proceeded to gun him down ruthlessly. It didn't occur to me that he wasn't fighting back, or that he was the same color as me. It's official, I am an asshole. It's safe to say that it won't happen again. He's probably blacklisted me, so I won't get the chance to apologize. If I had screwed up that badly back in high school, I would have been afraid to go back to school again.

For those of you following the Dad news, he passed his CDL test today, as if there was any doubt. He certainly was nervous about it last weekend. I didn't figure he would have a problem. It's just hard for me to imagine my Dad not being able to drive something. I don't know, maybe television has erased my imagination.

Firefly Disk 4 has arrived. We shall watch it tomorrow, as is our Friday routine, or at least if we do it this Friday it will be a routine. I am certain it will be worth waiting until tomorrow. We usually break it in with some Halo. We'll see. My connection has been really crappy lately, to the point where I spend most of the match watching the reconnect screen. I guess my ISP sucks before 8pm or so. When I don't have technical issues, I can piss people off. When I keep getting shitty connection problems, I look like a noob and am lucky to get 4 kills.

So, apparently calling someone a shitfucking cockmangler doesn't win them over to your side on xbox live. I really should learn to turn the microphone off. I did have to say to a particular set of morons that they should really learn not to stand still and zoom in with the sniper rifle. When the game is all snipers and no motion sensor, you are just asking for me to sneak up on you and bash you in the back of the head. I appreciate your ignorance, because that's my favorite way to kill someone. I just feel bad for you to always be humiliated in this way.

Today we finally watched disk three of Firefly. I am growing to like that series more by the minute. I am already feeling down that I will have to stop watching it after three more disks. It truly and totally sucks that they killed it. I crave more damnit.

Continuing from yesterday, I didn't see the Dreyers guy today. He said on Wednesday that he would be here Friday to kill a feature for me, but he didn't show. It's not that I can't kill a feature, that's easy. It's that he's a lying prick. He purposefully doesn't listen to what you want. If he were working for me I would fuck with him constantly. I would have him hating ice cream. He would go home and throw up when he sees an ice cream commercial on TV. Anyway, I'm off to sleep. (I always use anyway at the end of a post. I also use it to signal when you should shut up in an argument with me).

So, all my talk of today going to suck? It did. Today wasn't fucking around. It was the kind of day that gets down on its knees and puts that cock right in its mouth. The ice cream freezer stopped working last night, so they had to pull everything out of it and put it in shopping carts in the back room. While this saved the store upwards of $10,000, it meant that I had to restock everything this morning, as well as do all my freight that they didn't work last night. Needless to say, I was unprepared for the inspection from the corporate dirtbags. At least I was busy. If the dairy manager hadn't come over to help my ass, I would still be stocking shit. Today was a full day to say the least. Tomorrow the cleanup continues, as I must organize the shit out of the back room since I have so much goddamned backstock. I have been cleaning up after morons for the last two days, so I haven't had a chance to get shit done like I normally do. Tomorrow I count everything in the back, do all my price changes and kick the Dreyers man in the ass for being such a prick.

Soon enough another friend of mine is coming over to play some videogames. I must share the wealth. People need to see the 360 in action. It's a side benefit that I get to feel the shallowest of emotions as my friends play games on my system. I just feel that I spent $400 and I will get more out of it if I get to share it with others. As long as I get to watch. Although there isn't much that's more frustrating than watching someone go through what you've already gone through, and they are doing it wrong. Anyway, I think he's here, so I'm going to go now.

Goddamnit it Webtrap. Now I have to retype this whole thing thanks to your fucking stupid ass. I should uninstall you, you fuck.

Anyway, as I had said before webtrap fucked this post in the ass, there were some friends over for Ghost Recon this evening. It was worth it. We switched to Halo 2 later, and got our asses kicked. I managed a few second place finishes, but I couldn't really find a rhythm. Halo2 is all about the rhythm.

Dad is off to trucking school. He comes back briefly this weekend, and then takes his road test next week. After that he takes off to work full time for the company that sponsored his schooling. As I've said before the down side is he will be gone for so long. He only gets 4 days off per month. They haven't said if those days are all together or not, but I imagine they are. Only the Army pulls shit like that on their people. This will go hardest on Mom. I've suggested that she go with him, but he feels she won't be able to handle it and she feels she has to continue working. Not that I'm trying to get them out of the house, but in my mind they should be together.

Tomorrow is shaping up to be a shitty day at work. They are sending us dirtbags from corporate to inspect us. These people will find something wrong because there must be something up if your sales are up 44% yesterday and 22% for the week. They are just desperate to find a way to bring the company down. If they fire me, I don't really care. I can just follow my father's footsteps. Also I can make real money while I'm at it. Anyway, I'm off to sleep, or tomorrow will suck harder.