I'm sitting here listening to Green Bay sing Long View, and I'm realizing that my life is kind of patterned off this song. I have got to get off my ass and get something done. The difference is that I'm not a chronic masturbating pothead. Thank God for that. I've got the History Channel and video games instead. I also watch Spike.
Today they had world's wildest police videos or something. I've noticed that rednecks always get pulled over drunk with no shirts on. How hard is it to put a shirt on? Is there some kind of redneck code where you aren't a real man if you wear some cotton woven pussy t-shirt? Is going shirtless symbolic of your naked stupidity? Are you saying that I'm just jealous because I'm too fat to not wear a shirt in public? Guess what jackass, most rednecks are too fat to not wear a shirt too. Beer and wife beating don't exactly give you a six pack. (I work strictly from stereotypes, especially with a tv inspired blog).
I guess there are situations where it's permissible to not wear a shirt. If you're working outside like on a construction site where you are doing serious manual labor then I could see why you'd want to. If you're loading or unloading hay, then I can see it too. Showers and swimming are also acceptable. Going to the grocery store? Not acceptable. Church? Not acceptable. Probably not acceptable at a job interview either. I guess that depends on the job. If you're auditioning for Chippendales then you kind of have to take the shirt off.
I'm succeeding in finding things to complain about that don't relate to Wal-Mart. Hell these things don't even relate to me.
Friday, March 23, 2007
Sunday, March 18, 2007
We ended up watching 300. You can see this post to find out what I thought of it.
Today I was out mowing the lawn with this reel mower we purchased from Lowes. Apparently to save money they had their sweat shop install plastic gear wheels with metal pins that drive them. Amazingly, the metal pin has worn through the plastic gears. As a result, the blades don't turn when you push the mower. I'm about 3/4 of the way done with the lawn, and now it gets to look like some lazy schmo (how do you spell that?) decided it was too hard to mow this lawn. All 1/2 acre of it. I think it's a half acre anyway, I really don't know. It's like only getting half of your hair cut.
I hope we still have the receipt so we can get it exchanged for a new one. We've only mowed the lawn about 4 times. Am I supposed to magically avoid all sticks in the grass? Is this mower only designed to mow golf courses? It does a marvelous job, when the cheap ass gears haven't worn out. Would it have been so hard to install metal gears?
Today I was out mowing the lawn with this reel mower we purchased from Lowes. Apparently to save money they had their sweat shop install plastic gear wheels with metal pins that drive them. Amazingly, the metal pin has worn through the plastic gears. As a result, the blades don't turn when you push the mower. I'm about 3/4 of the way done with the lawn, and now it gets to look like some lazy schmo (how do you spell that?) decided it was too hard to mow this lawn. All 1/2 acre of it. I think it's a half acre anyway, I really don't know. It's like only getting half of your hair cut.
I hope we still have the receipt so we can get it exchanged for a new one. We've only mowed the lawn about 4 times. Am I supposed to magically avoid all sticks in the grass? Is this mower only designed to mow golf courses? It does a marvelous job, when the cheap ass gears haven't worn out. Would it have been so hard to install metal gears?
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Today we are going to see a movie. We'll either see 300, Zodiac, or some other movie that was mentioned to me in passing but sounded vaguely intriguing. I'm nervous about going to see a movie anymore due to my recent lack of judgment. My choices lately have included Aeon Flux, Ghost Rider and Casino Royale. Casino Royale and Ghost Rider would be fine as rentals, and I would even buy something like Casino Royale. Aeon Flux needs to be flushed down the toilet in Desperado. That movie was terrible. It was terrible and I saw it in the theater. I saw it in HD 7.1 surround full on suck. I hope the movie we see isn't this bad. I'm leaning towards 300, but I recently learned that Zodiac was directed by David Fincher. I learned this from MySpace of all damned places. Anyway, I've got to go get ready. I'll try to post which movie we saw sometime before the week is out.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
The customer is technologically inept. From asking where the internet explorers are to thinking that component video also carries sound, they really excel at ignorance at your local Wal-Mart. For one thing, you shouldn't be asking someone at Wal-Mart any kind of tech questions at all. It happens that at our Wal-Mart we have several people who know technical information. But you as the customer aren't really interested in technical information. You aren't interested in the fact that your new computer doesn't work properly because you screwed something up in the setup process. You think that the CD drive is a cup holder. You think that widescreen movies have had something cropped off of them. This is because you are misinformed. When you are given the correct information and you insist that this new information is wrong, then that makes you a moron. Yes, I said it. If you are corrected on something and you refuse to learn, you are a moron. You're a moron because you choose to be. No one is born a moron. You have made a series of life choices that made you what you are (moron).
The customer is a thief. While you the customer pay the bills by buying stuff, when you order a cup of popcorn chicken and then don't pay for it, leaving it on the shelf somewhere for us to clean up, you are a thief. When you return a bag of frozen rolls because you thought you were buying biscuits, you are a thief. When you return something because you didn't like the flavor, you are a thief. You are not entitled to a pleasant food experience when you are trying something new. And how bad off are you that you can't spare $3 on a fucking bag of rolls? I work at Wal-Mart and make less than the poverty line a year and I can spare $3. And you know what? I own my own home. You have no excuse.
The customer is always a jerk. Don't feed me the bipolar excuse, shut your mouth if you have nothing nice to say. Contrary to your opinion, the person in the blue vest isn't interested in your opinion. Because you are the customer, you don't know what you're talking about. The person who works with this item every day is far above you in knowing its proper use. Treating them like crap doesn't get you anything except a special place in hell. You can avoid Wal-Mart if you wish, but all retail personnel feel like this most of the time when dealing with you.
The customer is always an interruption. Please try to remember this when you ask someone where something is. We will gladly help you find it, but keep the fact that you are an interruption at the forefront of your thinking so as to avoid being a jerk. When you say that you bought it here last week, you are a liar. We haven't carried it in three years. I am certain that you bought it at another Wal-Mart, and we will probably never carry this item again. The home office is adept at making sure we don't have what the customer wants, that way they don't have to pay as big a bonus in April.
If the customer is the boss, the boss needs to get off his ass and do something for himself once in a while. You are quite capable of putting minutes on your own damned prepaid cell phone. Whose phone is it? If it's not mine, then I'm not adding minutes to it. It's one of the easiest things you will ever do. It's the same idea behind buying groceries to refill your fridge when it's empty. You figured that out didn't you? Well, figure this out. The phone, while it is a piece of technology, is not capable of hurting you. It will cause you no pain, it will not simply cease to function because you FOLLOWED WRITTEN DIRECTIONS. If you can't read, public education has been paid by taxes for years, you need to get in there and learn how. A six year old can do it for God's sake, are you saying that a six year old deserves to be in charge of you?
To all the good customers who buy all of your stuff without complaining and hook up your own tv's correctly and replace equipment when it breaks without blaming it on the sales associate I thank you. You are a rare breed. You are very special indeed. Keep up the good work, it is a pleasure working for you. You almost make it possible to deal with the rest of them.
The customer is a thief. While you the customer pay the bills by buying stuff, when you order a cup of popcorn chicken and then don't pay for it, leaving it on the shelf somewhere for us to clean up, you are a thief. When you return a bag of frozen rolls because you thought you were buying biscuits, you are a thief. When you return something because you didn't like the flavor, you are a thief. You are not entitled to a pleasant food experience when you are trying something new. And how bad off are you that you can't spare $3 on a fucking bag of rolls? I work at Wal-Mart and make less than the poverty line a year and I can spare $3. And you know what? I own my own home. You have no excuse.
The customer is always a jerk. Don't feed me the bipolar excuse, shut your mouth if you have nothing nice to say. Contrary to your opinion, the person in the blue vest isn't interested in your opinion. Because you are the customer, you don't know what you're talking about. The person who works with this item every day is far above you in knowing its proper use. Treating them like crap doesn't get you anything except a special place in hell. You can avoid Wal-Mart if you wish, but all retail personnel feel like this most of the time when dealing with you.
The customer is always an interruption. Please try to remember this when you ask someone where something is. We will gladly help you find it, but keep the fact that you are an interruption at the forefront of your thinking so as to avoid being a jerk. When you say that you bought it here last week, you are a liar. We haven't carried it in three years. I am certain that you bought it at another Wal-Mart, and we will probably never carry this item again. The home office is adept at making sure we don't have what the customer wants, that way they don't have to pay as big a bonus in April.
If the customer is the boss, the boss needs to get off his ass and do something for himself once in a while. You are quite capable of putting minutes on your own damned prepaid cell phone. Whose phone is it? If it's not mine, then I'm not adding minutes to it. It's one of the easiest things you will ever do. It's the same idea behind buying groceries to refill your fridge when it's empty. You figured that out didn't you? Well, figure this out. The phone, while it is a piece of technology, is not capable of hurting you. It will cause you no pain, it will not simply cease to function because you FOLLOWED WRITTEN DIRECTIONS. If you can't read, public education has been paid by taxes for years, you need to get in there and learn how. A six year old can do it for God's sake, are you saying that a six year old deserves to be in charge of you?
To all the good customers who buy all of your stuff without complaining and hook up your own tv's correctly and replace equipment when it breaks without blaming it on the sales associate I thank you. You are a rare breed. You are very special indeed. Keep up the good work, it is a pleasure working for you. You almost make it possible to deal with the rest of them.
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