I did something terrible today. I placed my phone in my pocket. I know right? Who does that these days? If I had known that this horrifying war crime would have resulted in the death of my touch screen phone I probably still would have done it because where the hell else am I supposed to put it? I don't carry a purse because I'm a man.

Oh, "put it in a holster" you say. Sure that works for maybe a week. Then the strap that holds it to my belt breaks and the phone suffers at least a three foot fall. Devastating!

What do you "never lifted an object that weighs more than 10 pounds before" office people do to keep your phone working for the entire two year contract? Oh that's right, you don't actually do work with your body. You type. You think. You bitch about your boss but you don't lift anything except yourself.

So distressing to be forced to buy a Samsung bulletproof Rugby phone in order to keep a phone for more than 6 months. No one makes an internet ready large screened actually durable phone. The only durable phones are ugly and have tiny screens. I guess us working folks are destined to have to use them though.

I have a Rugby phone issued to me by my boss. One time it fell out of it's holster while I was getting out of a truck. I didn't realize it until 30 minutes later after I had moved said truck to do my job. This truck was half loaded with salt water. That's 1500+ gallons of 9-10lb per gallon salt water. I found my phone over by where I had loaded the water. It was in the tire tracks left by the truck. I ran over it with a 25,000 lb vehicle. It still works. This didn't even scratch the screen. If this had been an iphone the damage would have been so great as to break 10 other iphones randomly in other states.

Why can't all phones be like this? Would it be so horribly unprofitable to make a durable product? I can understand that my xbox or tv or computer is not waterproof or impact proof. They don't have to be because they are not portable. If you tell me your device is portable I should be able to put it in my pocket and then go about my rugged, impact ridden, extremely dusty and sweaty day and not have to worry. I shouldn't pull it out of my pocket and find the screen cracked because my car keys were also in my pocket and OH MY GOD I sat down. I sat down. I didn't go bungee jumping or fight a UFC bout or stab myself in the leg with an ice pick right where the phone was. All I did was sit down. The horror.

All this to say you won't be getting a hold of me on my phone for a while because I don't have $300 or more to replace my phone. Maybe Obama can give me a phone or at least promise to. I should be able to send text messages on his promises combined with ATT's 97% of all Americans covered shouldn't I? Makes sense to me.